Is My Son the Next Henny Youngman?

 For those of you who don’t know who Henny Youngman is, shame on you!  No, seriously, Henny Youngman was known as “King of the One Liners”.  He actually passed away the same year that my son was born (1998).  His most famous line was “Take my wife…..please!”

My son also seems to have a penchant for one-line comments that make me laugh.  This past week, he shared some gems with us that I wanted to share with you guys:

We were in San Antonio last weekend for my wife’s 20th high school reunion (mine is next year in Dallas).  While we were walking along the beautiful Riverwalk, with its shops and restaurants, someone right in front of us was blowing smoke directly into our faces.  My eight-year old son said dryly, “Whoever invented cigarettes should be dragged into the street and shot.”  I couldn’t help but laugh, but then I also wondered where he could have possibly heard this phrase before.  He told me that he saw it in one of his Garfield books.

  Later that weekend, we were in the van and my wife and I kissed.  The kids were behind us in their seats, and the kiss was longer than a peck, but shorter than something you wouldn’t do in front of the kids, if that makes any sense (makes more sense when you say it out loud than if you write it).  Anyway, after we finished kissing, my son said, “Great!  Now I have to wash my eyeballs!” while rubbing his eyes, as if that could somehow erase the image of his parents smooching.

Last night, after we finished his bedtime prayers, he held out his arms in a preformed circle and said, “Give me a hug, big guy!!”  Of course, I was happy to oblige, so I bent down to hug him.  He didn’t really latch on for the hug, but it was a hug nonetheless.  Then, he said, “I was actually talking to God.  But now you got your Bran hug for the day anyway.”  (We call them Bran hugs because his name is Brandon.)

If you liked this post, I have shared here a number of times about funny things that he has said, along with funny stuff from my other kids as well (see below).  Enjoy!

My kids are future comedians!   

My Toddler Daughter’s Current Favorite Show  

Three funniest things my kids have said this week

Funny quotes from my son

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